The kids have been with us for 2 years and 2 months today, yet it still feels like a baby-sitting job. Their biological mother was supposed to get them back. But the more I think back on it, it's just too easy and too convenient.
Yes, I've adopted them, it's now been 3 months. But it's hard making that transition. The transition from Nieces and Nephews to "Mom" and "daughter" and "son".
The Boy: "Mom...Mom... MOM....Mom.MOM.....MMMOOOOOM"
Me: *thought* what is that noise? *shocked expression* crap that's me! "What SON?!?" The word sticks in my throat. He pauses mid step. I've never called him that before. He looks back and as he passes the doorway to go into his room, he has a huge grin on his face.
I feel that moment was the very first time we connected.
Before they came, I used to look in on the empty rooms, set up and waiting for their arrival. I thought of what would happen if they stayed with us forever. I never thought they would have so many disorders or traumas. But I thought after their mother lost one child, she would learn something and latch on to them and do right by them.
Here we are, I thought wrong.
I also never thought that when they lost their mother, I would be losing mine. But in that sense the kids and I are the same. We never really had a mother or a father. Now they will. If I can just wrap my head around it.
If I can stop catching myself whenever I say I have 5 kids. And stop pausing and thinking "Holy shit! I have FIVE kids! Even as I type this, I'm still incredulous to it all. I mean will I ever adjust? Will I ever wake up? It's all so surreal.
Is this a normal reaction? I know when most people adopt, it's an expectation to be forever and to be parent and child. But what about relative adoption? or fosters with no plans of reunification after failed attempts or termination of parental rights? Is it a shock for everyone?
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