Crickets, Police calls, what next?

So, I've been pretty damn busy with my farm on facebook cleaning and stuff. But it seems my deep cleaning of my bathroom brought out a family of crickets.  I don't know if it has to do with the type of hearing loss I have, but the sound of a chirping cricket is like nails on chalkboard for me. So this time of the year and especially this year for some reason is excruciating.  For five nights in a row, I've had a cricket chirping in my bathroom. 

Let me clarify. Night 1, caught the cricket and released it outside (yes, I'm dumb). Night 2, repeat, night 3 repeat, night 4 repeat...day 5...ran out to the store and bought a plethora o'crap to kill the suckers because by then my peacefulness and catch and release feelings were loooong gone.  Sprayed and discovered that the crickets were outside in the eaves of my house.  This after having the oldest help me look for the cricket and thinking that it was behind the bathroom mirror.  This after her climbing on our tub and trying to hear if the sound of the cricket was coming from there and this after her promptly falling in to said tub and doing some sort of splash park slide along the side of the tub bringing down my plant and covering herself with soil along the way. 

I know she could have been seriously hurt but man oh man I have not laughed so hard in a long time. I'm talking deep wheezing belly laughs because I got to see her fall from behind and her facial expressions from the front reflecting in the mirror. Priceless. 

At any rate, I sprayed relentlessly. Then that night, I was so happy, there were goosebumps on my shoulders and the back of my neck. I was THAT happy.  I did the happy dance and gloated like mad. I was at peace. Of course, I still had my insomnia and couldn't fall asleep until about 2 am when I drug my exhausted butt into bed and laid there staring at the ceiling finally drifting off... approximately 5 minutes later (no exaggeration), I hear the cricket, my eyes pop open. "You've gotta be F'ing kidding me." Hubbins can't believe it either. 

I go into my bathroom and there in the same exact spot is another cricket. kid.you.not.   It's just looking at me chirping away. ARGGGHHHHH! No more ms. nice guy. I grabbed the vacuum sucked that damn cricket up and set it outside, vacuum and all.  Some of you might be thinking..well that's nothing....but the next day was Hubbins program day and I just happened to empty the vacuum canister into the same bag and toss it out.  That's all I'll say about that...but I can reassure you all it was not just crickets being crickets...IT WAS A CONSPIRACY!

Last night I was prepared to do the "cricket dance" but instead, instead we had total silence which was pretty damn awesome until I heard the chain on the gate rattling and Hubbins had heard footsteps by our window just before that. Someone was in our yard. They removed the gate from it's hinges, came in and released our "younger" (12 years old) dog and who knows what else because I have not been out there since last night when it was pitch dark. 

I had yelled out the window "who's out there?" in perfect stupid girl who dies within the first minute of the horror film fashion. Because they could see me in my room perfectly but all I saw was darkness outside.  Then I simply said I was calling the police.  To which any one could easily watch me sit down and google the police department and then pick up the phone. I know...

Yes... I googled our police department. I didn't think it warranted a call to 911. I had my trusty solid metal bat and my car alarm panic button in reach. I waited and waited for over an hour. I posted on facebook while I waited, I tended to my farm in Farm Town. The whole time, I kept thinking I should be more...I dunno. I just felt like I should've been more scared...or you know maybe caring is the word( I was thinking of my friend Kether and other friends who have told me I am too calm and carefree about these types of things) . So, I got up and shut the windows in the kitchen, living room and game room.  

I heard the neighbor car alarm across the street go off. She came out with her dog 15 minutes or so later. I was going to go outside but then I remembered I was supposed to stay inside until the police came. I shouted to her through the window.  She must think I am crazy. She is new and we haven't met before. She yelled that a dog was loose.  I told her to hold on and I went outside. By the time I got there, she was gone.  But I saw the damage to my fence and then I saw my dumb dog peeing by her steps and then kicking with her hind legs to cover it. Son of a .....

I called our dog back and when I went to put her collar back on with the tie down, I saw that it had simply been removed and placed on the ground. Not happy. 

The police finally arrived over an hour later. My dogs didn't even bark. He suggested I get a new younger dog like a boxer or a sheperd.  At least one who will bark. I joked that my dogs were too old to care anymore.  But I realized, they really are. Ava only barks when she's hungry and Dellyne only barks when she's stuck. Grrrrreat...

The officer fixed my fence and told me all about how my neighborhood sucked and how they are always out here. Not in those exact words but still...Lovely. He asked me some questions about the people around me. But we both agreed that it had been pretty good since the gangbangers across the street were foreclosed upon.  I know that's bad...but the gunshots and cars tearing  out of here were the final straw for me. 

Today I am going to change the way the hinges are installed on the gates. I think I have a better way than what the installation instructions said. I'm also going to eventually install some flood lights. I don't know if I will get out today but I do know that I am tired of the crud around here. 

A Birthday Party

So Hubbin's 43rd b-day was on the 6th of this month.  We had a little Luau where we played some limbo and ate Hubbin's world famous orange chicken for dinner. It is so yummy. He's finally perfected it. lol

I know... terrible the birthday boy made his own dinner.  I just don't know how and it takes all day to do. I will learn though. 

I did however, bake his cake. This cake is crazy. I've never tasted it. Just the

 thought....well...you'll see. 

First thing, chocolate cake...with holes poked in it. 

Next, one can of sweetened condensed milk. 

Pour it all over, not just in the holes. 

Next you'll cover it with Hershey's chocolate syrup AND caramel. Not as drenched as the sweetened condensed milk, but still generous. 

I forgot to take a picture but up there is a close up to get the idea. Next, you'll use a whole container of extra creamy whipped cream and just dollop and spread it everywhere. Last, yep, still more... break up 4 heath or skor toffee bars and spread them over the cake. 

Then drizzle more caramel and more chocolate syrup on top. Put the refrigerator until ready to serve.

TADA!

Here's a slideshow of the day! 

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Better Late Then Never

This post has been sitting in my queue since June 2nd, 1:03 am. I have 65 drafts in my queue because I can't stand using blogger's post "thumbnail". I say thumbnail because we have the entire screen in which they could use to make our post box a little larger so we could easily move our pictures and text to where we want them to be but nooooooooo, we get like a 2 inch rectangle to compose our posts. Anyhow...end rant. (It took over an hour and a half to get the Purries post done. Wish I WAS kidding.)

This was our Memorial day celebration:

Somewhere down the line, I got it in my head that we should grind some meat for burgers. I think it started when I bought some mixed round steak. I say mixed because it was this huge package of thinly sliced steaks, two large roasts and a section of ground in the middle. That was the best cheeseburger EVER.  So, um, yeah. That's probably where I got it in my mind to take one of the roasts and do this...

Chopping the roast, separating the fat.  

See how pretty? (If you are a vegetarian, I apologize). I knew our mixer had a grinding attachment...so I thought, what the heck?!?

I felt all....farmish and stuff. I've never done anything remotely like this. 

Hmmm....
I don't know why it was so bright red in the bowl...maybe the white bowl. We actually ended up grinding two batches of meat with that one roast. 
Here's the spread...ignore all the crap on the back counter. It's clean now...I'll prove it in a picture...6 weeks from now. *smirk* 

We had some really good corn on the cob (I don't know about you, but corn tends to be hit or miss out here), cheeseburgers, potato salad (not pictured) and watermelon. 

I even made this cupcake tower thingy myself.  Boy did the kids eye that baby...lol 

It was a good day... even though it was last month...lol 

PS...Now I want a cheeseburger...

Make a free card for Father's Day ...

and donate a quarter to the Dave Thomas Adoption Foundation. 

Click here! 

Who wants to tell her?

"Hi, It's me, Lil Miss Purries! Don't you love MY new cottage?"

"I feel so loved and special!"

"It could use some personal touches but I'm not too worried about it, I have tons of ideas!"

"Say what?"

The last pic is when I told her it wasn't hers.  Seriously, she moved in and everything. I can't believe I forgot to take a picture of it, but I was able to crop it from the house pic. 

Do you see that little brown doll in the crib? The one with the nose pulled up? That's Purr Purr's baby. She has about 9 different ones but that teddy is her favorite. A muffled meow can be heard throughout the house at times as she goes from room to room with her baby in her mouth. She LOVES to spread her babies around the house.  I will find them in the oddest places. SHE put her baby in that crib by the way. Her meowing as she did it is what caught my attention. 

She is a weird one. Do you all have pets who do some crazy things...oh, nothing like this? Ok. 

RAD don't live here anymore...

(Click picture to enlarge) 

I know some of you will think I am foolish. You will think it is a honeymoon period or just one of the ebbs and flows of the Radtastic Journey.

I have vacillated so many times about my kids diagnosis. When they were diagnosed with RAD. I was relieved. An answer! As we went forward with play therapy... I started to feel like my kids were taking on symptoms and behaviors. (I should note they were very susceptible to suggestion and eager to please) Sort of like Munchausen .

The previous therapist was great. I understood he was trying to move the children forward and out of their victim status and into their new lives. But the kids didn't get it and they didn't get him. Truthfully, sometimes  *I* didn't get him. That is why I moved the kids to a play therapist.  I thought we were going to move closer to what the first therapist was working on. Instead this play therapist tore us apart. Literally, she dissected us and told us our flaws. She verbally attacked us and rolled her eyes. I should've ended it sooner.  In the end, we were stronger as a unit when we left because we all felt betrayed by her and as if she attacked us. 

She undermined me in that room. She put it in their heads that they weren't getting enough love and attention from us because there were so many of them. She expressed this belief to me before she even met the kids. Then she parroted it to me while questioning the kids in front of  me. My kids looked at their shoes and agreed with her. I was an awful mother. SHE was bonding with my kids. Only the oldest disagreed with her and she hated her. The therapist said mean things about the oldest and even went so far as to say that I was wasting my money paying for the oldest to go to private school because she is lazy --right in front of the oldest.

Afterwards, on the way to the car my kids would tell me they were getting enough love and attention, they would tell me she was wrong  and I just assumed they were saying that because they felt bad or were scared.  Because of the RAD, I thought my kids had used triangulation on the therapist and me.  But I've come to think that they just felt bad about themselves and it showed. I'm ashamed I didn't get it because I was so blinded by "THE RAD! " I reinforced everything that bitch therapist put in their heads because I believed what she said and repeated it to them ever since on a daily basis even after we parted ways. 

That is until 3 weeks ago when I decided in our house RAD is a bullshit excuse and none of them have it.   I was out of line. I shouldn't have used those exact words.  But the bottom line is, in our house it is truth.  

I don't think I am crazy. I don't think I have to accept my kid's limitations because I don't think those limitations are real. Yes, my kids have PTSD and yes I think 1 of them is having a real hard time moving on but I think it's because she's a narcissist not because she has RAD.  I know  I'm not a professional but I know my kids and what I read about others with RAD kids.   My kids don't have it. It's not denial. 

Since my "declaration", Poufy gained 5 pounds and grew an inch... her meds for her thyroid were reduced.  She's thriving. Same with SS, not the weight gain but she's definitely happier and doing extremely well in homeschool.   The boy is being a normal lazy 7 year old boy trying to get out of any work.  He's pushing his limits.  And CDQ, she's still trying to draw attention to herself and make everything about her. But it's not because of RAD, it's because of the bitch of a narcissist she had for a mother.   I know my sister and that is what she is and her and my mother did this to this child with all their "special" crap. CDQ is not used to NOT being the golden child that can do no wrong and it's tearing her apart because without it, I can tell she knows she just like everyone else and she can't take that. 

This is CDQ EXACTLY, all 1-9. No kidding. 

The DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder are: 

A pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, lack of empathy, as indicated by at least five of the following:

1. a grandiose sense of self-importance

2. is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love

3. believes that he or she is "special" and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)

4. requires excessive admiration

5. has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favourable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations

6. is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends

7. lacks empathy and is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others

8. is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her

9. shows arrogant, haughty behaviours or attitudes 

I can give a million examples of these things. 

So I'm taking my kids off the RAD train. We'll see if we need to board again, but I wouldn't be surprised if we never did again. 

A real post...

will be coming shortly. 

But for now, CDQ still hates me and she told the kids that she's a biatch.  Lovely. I asked if she thought she was a bitch (because if you are going to say it you might as well say it properly) and she smirked and told me yes. Ok, so she won because I asked her if she thought I was a bitch (knowing the answer already) and of course she said yes. Perhaps, the best route would have been to tell her "so you want to be just like me." but instead...*sigh* instead, I told her she hadn't seen anything yet. 

Because honestly... she hasn't. We still have at least 9 more years together and who really knows what the hell I will do next to piss her off.  But I know if it involves doing the right thing or heading in the right direction with her, she will hate it. 

BTW, her smirk fell right off her face when I said that.  Honestly, I'm torn about it because I want her to know I'm not giving up but I also don't want her to be afraid of me. Although, I'm not sure what she would be afraid of. 

So for now, we are chugging along in homeschool, except for her. I have been leaving her out. She's causing chaos with the others: hitting them and just basically trying to get them in trouble because they are doing the right things. They don't want to be around her anyway. 

Get this, they think she's stupid. Well, more pointedly, she does stupid things. I told them they did the same things as her. Poufy and SS told the oldest that they wanted to be good and not do those things or act that way anymore. They don't like being that way. 

However, it's like a switch with mine. It's just off. I know some of your kids have expressed it's a struggle for them. I've seen when my kids struggle. But the RAD diagnosis is still a question in my mind.  I'm sure they will get mad at me and act out again...but I think the peeing and the stealing and the lying beyond normal child limits has ended.  I may be jinxing myself.  But it feels different around here. 

The other kids are happy even with the crappy rules ( I don't like them but if they are working....well what can I say?)  in place.  I haven't rewarded them like I used to whenever they did something good. When they try to bargain with me all I say is "It takes six weeks, at least, to make something a habit." (Boy, if my mother would have said that to me I would have been sooooo annoyed.) I think it's sad but at this point being allowed to feed the dogs is a reward.  

I really shouldn't be so down on it because it means they are embracing the chance at responsibility. They don't know it, but they are. But it's just sad to me.  Maybe because they are so old. I mean wouldn't a younger child be extra eager to have these responsibilities bestowed on them? 

If I take a good look back, I have SS and Poufy who are three weeks into this habit forming journey. Three weeks...funny how it coincided with the end of the oldest's school year. 

At any rate, I have pictures, pictures and more pictures to post.  But Poufy has a Dr's appt. hopefully that doctor won't give me grief because she ran out of pills the day before yesterday and today is the soonest I can pick them up.  

Tell me this, what the hell am I supposed to do with a kid who has a hyperthyroid, eats like a horse but has had like 3 growth spurts upward and hardly any weight gain?  The doctor gets on my case but does she know how much the kids have grown since they've been in my care?  This child has gone from a 4t to a size 6-7 (mainly because she is soooo skinny) in about a year in a half.  

The doctor complained because Poufy's pants were highwaters. Um, did you see her waist?  That's the proof that she's growing but not gaining.  I've bought her longer pants but then they don't fit at the waist...So now, I've resorted to overalls.   

Can't please everyone, can I?