That other thing that happened Tuesday night

In the previous post I briefly mentioned being able to take two children to catechism.



The boy ended up at the library but CDQ stayed for her class. They hadn't been to class in a few weeks due to behavior so I was talking to the teacher to see if there was anything we needed to do to catch her up.



But while the teacher was talking, I heard one girl ask CDQ who she was voting for. (And BTW, my kids have had arguments at the dinner table who they are going to vote for and why. It's amazing what they retain but I'm not entirely convinced they actually understand what they are saying.lol) CDQ said Obama and the girl's voice went down in disgust.



"You're going to vote for Obama? Do you know he's for abortion."
She hissed the last part at CDQ.

I wish I was exaggerating.



By this point I wasn't even listening to the instructor, but was watching what was taking place. CDQ looked taken aback by this girl who had such a look of disgust and had literally shrunk back away from her in her chair.



People may disagree with me, and I do understand that this is someone else's child but my child was involved too.



From across the room I said "Uh, uh. You are not going to do that to her. She does not need you saying those things to her just because she doesn't believe the same things you do. Just like you have a choice so does she."



The instructor who was still talking to me asked what was going on. I told her that my daughter didn't need to be brainwashed to believe the same things. She told me she had just been asking the kids who they were voting for in the election when we came in. I also told her we don't align ourselves with everything the church says.



I don't. To me, God and religion are two very different things. To me there is God. Then there is religion which is man made and prone to error. I will not blame God for the things that people do.



I was livid that this was happening. This is America: Freedom, choice, etc... and this is Catechism: no judgement, no hate, etc...



I continued to speak to the teacher and when I was done I went up to CDQ and I told her that I wanted her to understand that Obama is not for abortion. He's for a woman's right to choose because in the end it's a woman's choice and no one elses.



I don't want her growing up and believing that it is someone else's fault women have abortions. Because whether people like or not, whether it is legal or not, there will be abortions. If she ends up having an abortion in life, she has no one else to blame but herself. ( of course there are exceptions: rape, health, etc.) I want her to grow up knowing that should she put herself in a situation where she has been irresponsible, she can find herself at this predicament that only she can decide. She has to know that she has to be responsible for whatever outcome of her actions and how it's not to be taken lightly. She has to know where she stands before she ever comes to that crossroad, if ever. She has to know these things so she can prevent it. THAT is the best way I feel I can teach my kids about abortion. It is a slippery slope and it is not black and white.



When I went to pick CDQ up she was telling the other kids how she was told she should vote for McCain because she is white and that all the white people should vote for McCain. Apparently, they also told a black child that she should vote for Obama because she is black. This caused the girl to cry. They were about to break into groups where there would be a McCain table and only "McCain Lovers" could sit there and an Obama table where only "Obama Lovers" could sit.



If you are saying WTF? So was I. I asked her what the teacher did and she told me that the teacher told the kids they were going too far. If you ask me, the teacher let this go too far and the fact that she's the one who started it quite frankly pisses me off.

Oopsies!

Tuesday night I was able to take two of the kiddos to Catechism. CDQ and The Boy. The other two not so.

Unfortunately, The Boy's class was having a Halloween party and the Boy had lost all Halloween privileges. I suspected there was going to be a problem when he found out this little tidbit. But to my surprise, he took it very well. As in he accepted that he had done many many many many things wrong and it was his consequence.

I still wanted to reward him for being good lately. I decided to take him to get a library card. He's been doing an excellent job with his beginning sounds. I told him because of that, I thought he was going to be reading soon and I wanted him to be able to read a lot. He was nervous about it.

When we got up to the counter, I went blank at his age so I asked him how old he was. At our library, you have to be at least 7 to get a card. He told me he was 7. So I told the librarian. As I was filling out the form, I thought something wasn't right but it didn't sink in. I was too worried about the time and when I had to pick CDQ up. The librarian asked if he was 7 again and I said "yup!" still not thinking. She issued him a card. (This whole sequence will make sense a little later)

I showed him all the books that were available to him. He walked from row to row, touching the books and telling me to look at this one or that one. Then he asked how many he could check out. I told him 3. He went at it.

Some books I had to tell him he was going to have to work up to but he seemed to like that challenge. This is huge because this is a boy who could not identify letters that weren't in his name when I started with him. He's a first grader. He didn't want to do ANYTHING. He was too scared because he wasn't confident enough that he knew anything.

After making his selections, he took his books and card up to the desk and very matter of factly put them on the counter like he had been doing it for ages. I could tell he felt like such a big boy.

Later, at dinner, we were all talking about something that escapes me right now (senior moment) and the kids ages came up. That's when I realized the boy is actually 6, not 7 yet. How embarrassing. When I asked him why he said he was 7, he said he forgot and thought he was 7. lol I think maybe the librarian let him slide since his birthday is in 2 weeks. That or she saw my face, because she had asked me what was wrong when I first came in. But maybe next post, I'll address that.

At any rate, I am so proud of the boy and I am hoping the best for him and reading. It's the only thing (at least it seems) that I have been able to instill in all of them. I've been collecting children's books for as long as I can remember. They love to read and I've been reading to them.

My latest obsession...

Cherry slush with whole cherries. YUM! Not to mention half priced drinks during happy hour.



No I'm not being paid for this but I just had to share because see all those cherries? They make me sooooo happy. Little things...little things.



What are your current favorites?

He was a man of integrity, a man who kept his word...

I still remember Karlton Taylor. I remember him when times get too hard and I wonder what he would have to say about something or what kind of advice he would offer. I remember him when I change a tire. When I hear the words "french braids". I remember him when I see silver Hershey's kisses.

I see him every now and then. Like my mind doesn't or won't believe he is gone. I know it's irrational. But my mind plays tricks on me.

I remember his cool hand at the viewing, the only time I ever touched him, I thought it would make it real. I wouldn't allow him to touch me. He was always wanting to "lay hands" on me. I know it was some sort of prayer but I would not allow it.

I still can't talk about him or think about him without crying like it was yesterday. For me, it is still yesterday that I lost the best friend I ever had. The first person I was ever able to trust fully in my entire life. Literally. I think that's why it's so huge. He was in a way the only "true" family I ever had.

I still see him tapping his planner the last time we "met". We were both so busy, me with a new job and him with his plans for a toy drive. He pushed and pushed for us to meet. So we met after work in his car and he was telling me about his plans for the kids. He kept saying it was very important that we were on the same page.

I had never been in his car before. It was a shell. I wondered how he drove it. The doors had no interior, I could see the metal and mechanisms. I put my seat belt on even though he was just driving me from one parking lot to another. I didn't feel safe but I didn't know that this car would be his death.

He tapped his planner when I got out of the car and said he would put it down in the books that we had met. I think I may have called him a dork or told him he was dorky or something. I know he asked why because I remember telling him it was weird but I had no reason for why.

I remember the day he died was the first day I had ever seen him wear shorts. I had come in to ask him if he would go with me car shopping in LA. I was wanting to trade in my old one and get a different car. He told me he couldn't. He had a committment to speak and he wanted to keep his word. He didn't really want to go though. But he was going to do it anyway because he said he would.

But that was Karlton. When we had talked about death about a month before on the way to a computer show, he said when he died he wanted people to say he was a man of integrity and a man who kept his word.

Before the end of my work day, I had stopped in to ask him again if he wanted to go, but he wasn't there. He was supposed to be coming back shortly...but we all knew shortly was anything but with Karlton. lol When I left work that day, I toyed with the idea of trying to convince him to go again. I drove over to the other parking lot. I know he didn't really want to go to his other meeting but I told myself that I shouldn't interfere with that just because I was afraid to drive out to who knows where by myself. So I glanced at the building and drove off.

Driving off is something I carry with me everyday. I guess logically, I know I probably couldn't have changed anything. But it's still there and it's still in my heart.

If only I had stopped and he had come with me.

That night I went to the car dealership. They told me they couldn't take my car but I could still get a new car if I just kept my old one. I figured I could pass my old car (Ford Taurus) on to Karlton and it would be safe for Sharon and the kids and he could just take over payments. I told them I would have to get back to them because I wanted to talk to Karlton first.

I called him that morning when I was putting on my shoes, I got no answer. I decided to go car shopping locally. Trying to talk myself out of the whole car deal and telling myself I was crazy.

But if I had just stopped. Just tried one more time. He wouldn't have been out there on that street that night in a car that was nothing more than a piece of tin. He would have been with me and he would have been driving my Taurus, the family car with the highest safety rating, back from LA while I followed behind in my new car.

But I didn't stop. I didn't want to be "devil's advocate" and play on the fact that he didn't want to go.

So I live with this, knowing that I am being irrational but still being unable to stop it.

I know he is where he belongs in Heaven. Talking and talking...


I miss you.

I Couldn't Believe It!

Today we had the termite inspection, home inspection, and a contractor come out to the new house. Our Realtor had a closing this morning so it was just me and the guys at first. This evening I went and signed loan papers.

I was walking around the house, just rediscovering it really and I decided to go upstairs and hang out on the balcony for a bit. It's peaceful up there and since it was still mid-morning it was slightly chilly. I looked down on our yard and plotted out where I would add rose bushes since I love roses.

I snooped on the neighbors to the left and watched their waterfall in their backyard and I decided to look over at what the other neighbors had going on in their backyards. Not too bad. I had a sweater on but I didn't want to get too cold so I decided I better go back in. I reached for the door and wouldn't you know it? I was locked out...on the balcony... no realtor... no one really. The termite inspector had already left and the contractor hadn't arrived. Just me and the inspector.

I called Hubs as I gazed over the balcony. I was laughing pretty hard. I told him what I had done so he called the realtor, in the meantime, I noticed the inspector checking things out in the backyard. Thank goodness I remembered his name. I called down to him and he looked around down there. I called that I was up on the balcony and that I had locked myself out, he chuckled and said he'd be up.

I called Hubs back to let him know it was ok. The whole time I am cracking up and soooo embarrassed. The thought had crossed my mind that it could be locked but when I checked it, it didn't seem like it was.

When the inspector got up the stairs (there's the main flight of stairs to the second floor and then a smaller set of stairs from the second floor that leads up to this particular bedroom) he came with the contractor. As the contractor was introducing himself, his phone rang. It was my realtor. She was calling to see if he could "rescue" me. I heard him tell her that he thought I was ok and was just talking to me. Em-barr-assing. lol

The inspection came back "phenomenal". He found the homeowner's binder and all the documentation for everything: alarm system, appliances, flooring, EVERYTHING in the kitchen island drawers. The people who owned the house before kept immaculate records and actually left them behind!

It's bittersweet, I start to let myself get excited but then I try to put myself in check. Our house hasn't closed yet. Frankly, I am pissed. The woman who is working it is L-A-Z-Y and she keeps lying to us. We were supposed to be done by the end of this month but now she insists she said "closing" by the end of the month. I don't get her. She says we will be done before we even have to worry about making a November house payment but hello! It's due the first of November and if today was the last day to get them in before funding--how does she figure?

I think I'll just breathe easier when this house has closed. We have less than 3 weeks to get it wrapped up. It's stressing me out. If the people would just get off their asses. This should have been done this week(actually, three weeks ago). I've had to be on her constantly- phone calls and e-mail and she actually has the audacity to write me back in caps. I will be writing a post about them--name and all when everything is all said and done so anybody out there can avoid them.

*sigh* Less than three weeks.

Why I *Heart* My Realtor

This whole house selling and buying thing has been so stressful. I'm telling you, when I bought this house it was very similar to buying a car or something at the local store.

I saw three houses before this one, on the same block, and when I saw this one all I said is "We'll take it!' and it was ours. Sure we signed papers but we didn't go back and forth with offers and we didn't have all the waiting to hear from so and so.

So this time out it's been a totally different experience. Totally.

I didn't have a Realtor last time. Well, no, not really. There was a guy we had met when house searching. He showed us the houses and then stepped out of the picture. Which was fine. We didn't know a Realtor did all kinds of stuff.

Our Realtor has been excellent. She's worked really hard for us and pushed to get us everything we need and want. I have had so much fun meeting with her to see different houses. I don't know if it's just the Realtor experience, but her and I start talking about decorating and layout, etc... For instance, with the current house we were there for like three hours and we even went into decorating for Christmas (How the hell DO you hang Christmas lights on stucco?).

But what prompted this post was a conversation I had with her yesterday, I can't even remember what it was about but she made me laugh so hard my belly hurt (in a good way). She was talking about something or other to do with the house and if it didn't get down on time (or something ) we would be AOL.

I believe she meant SOL but anyone who's ever dealt with AOL would know that it's practically the same thing! She didn't catch that she had said it but man,the more I thought about it the harder I laughed. Even today when it pops into my mind I chuckle. So does Hubs. But hey, we are both computer people so maybe that's why it hits a funny bone with us.

Either way, I needed that laugh and it just made me like my Realtor even more!

Losing My Religion

I'm part of the Roman Catholic Homeschoolers in my area. I joined because I had no idea how to get started in homeschooling. When I signed up, it looked like it was going to be fun. Playdates with the kids, Mom's night out, field trips.

I didn't get to do any of those yet because I'm still "training" my kids amongst other things.

But lately the tone on the forum had changed. It was sinister, hateful and full of lies.

Some examples:

The left-wing knew about a PBS poll in advance (THEY CHEATED!) and we need to go vote for Palin--JESUS help US!

Obama wants to change the national anthem to "I want to teach the world to sing"-- FORGIVE US WE KNOW NOT WHAT WE DO!

Obama is Muslim-- GOD HAVE MERCY!

If you vote for someone who is pro-abortion you will be *gasp* EX-COMMUNICATED! and by your ownself to boot!

Worse yet, if you recieve communion having voted for a pro-abortionist (yep- pro-abortion- like it's something people cheer for! ABORTION! ABORTION! You know you want one! You know you need one! RAh Rah rah!, sheesh) "you yourself risk placing your soul going in hell"!!!!!!

Seriously... they've been posting this shit. I had enough. I'll bet you I get censored. But I had to say something. It's immature, it's hateful, it's lies. Is this the new Catholicism? Christianity in general?

For as long as I can remember abortion is something I have personally been against but would never tell someone else they could not do.

Even when I found out my mother had an abortion and that I could have had a full blooded sibling--one other person in this world, a real family, maybe someone like me-- I still could not be against it.

When Bela was murdered my feelings became even stronger. I don't doubt that abortion is painful. But I think that abortion of a fetus,baby, what have you is possibly less painful for the baby than to look in to your mother's eyes as she beats you or know that your Daddy who is supposed to love you so much has hurt you so bad you are dying.

I've held drug addicted babies as they've screeched from the pain of the light being to bright or the withdrawals being too much. Have you seen a newborn twitch in pain?

I've seen those babies growing up being destroyed, molested, abused, used.

I think it's worse when a 14 year old decides the pain of her life, the lack of love, caring and family hurts so much she would rather be dead and kill herself.

It's not to say that I don't care or love the kids I am talking about, but can't you just love a person so much you would rather they be in Heaven rather than living here in Hell?

I've seen what a lot of people can't fathom. They can't figure out why an abortion could be a better alternative. I've often wished that life circumstances could have been different and that I was the child who was aborted. No more pain. Just sweet Heaven.

Abortion will never be an answer for me and I can't put myself in another woman's shoes and know why she does it, but I don't need to know. It's something that she will live with for the rest of her life and only a decision she can make for herself.