A story about a period, boobies and Mr.PP Pants

So, just to update you on the situation with A...she took the book but not the pads. The next day she had already read the entire book and told the oldest she liked it and it helped answer some questions about various things she had.  The oldest made A take 4 pads with her and she wasn't so begrudging about it.  A was also spending the night at a friends house this weekend (I suspect another child informed their mother as well, hence the invite).  So, now it's all up to A on when to tell her mom. 

In the meantime... I've been preparing for my ten year old to come to me with the news that she has started. I bought her undershirts to wear, not because she needs them but just because she is ten.  

Then came the slap in the face while I was helping the 9 year old with her hair in the shower.  SHE'S already showing and if I am honest with myself will need a bra in the next couple of months.  Shit.   This is the masturbater, the one that I suspect may have touched her siblings inappropriately prior to the cameras (not just biting and hitting if you know what I mean?).  *sigh* 

I was ready for the ten year old...but not the 9 year old. Shit. Did I say that already? 

The other thing is the 9 year old can't help rubbing things in the 10 year old's face that she does better, math, reading, playing...breathing... now this?

I can't even bear the thought of that one starting her period. She's already a witch with a B.  Seriously.  So serious, I've looked up boarding schools.  This is the one with the worst rage issues.  Pfft.  My neck hurts. 

Changing the subject.  Up until today the boy decided he forgot how to use the bathroom.  I'm dying here because I took the sheets and comforter that he peed on to wash and noticed his mattress ( a baby crib mattress) has a hole in it and where that hole is there is a rusted spring. 

Call me neglectful or whatever and I'll invite you to come and check it yourself  but I have a baaaaaaaaad feeling he's been sticking his thingy in there and peeing instead of going to the bathroom.  I know I  need to put on my big girl panties and check it and be sure that's not what's been going on but I also know if it is what is going on, I am going to retch.  That show in front of the kids will not be good.   Is it wrong to have one of the other kids who would be totally excited and more than happy to do it, check it for me?  Really? Are you sure? 

Damn. 

Taking a time out...

Today has sucked ass. Sorry. There's no other way to say it. 

I have tried and tried and was successful in overcoming the lack of sleep and was doing pretty well if I do say so myself. 

I was outside trying to get the trees ready for the summer by laying down some of that weed fabric. I went to throw away the outer wrapping from the weed fabric when I noticed that the trash I had just collected out of my room the day before was full blown out of the bag and flying everywhere. 

I was confused at first because I tie those bags super tight. I mean waay tight and I'll explain in a minute. 

I've been cleaning out my room which kinda became a place to put things so the kids wouldn't steal it. I came across some old candy I had bought for a purpose and must have forgotten about (Don't worry, I don't buy things like that anymore- you know, those things where I hope the kids will change over night and we will be able to do something fun without a fight.) Anyhow, I had thrown that away and some other broken things and paperwork. 

Anyhow, when I went to throw out the trash, these candy wrappers were everywhere. This is old candy which is why it is in the trash to begin with. The only one who goes outside is SS.  She throws out the trash and takes care of the dogs and I kid you not it takes her 3 hours. 

I never caught her though. I go out there and check and I've never caught her. 

Well, she's going through the trash bags and eating the trash out of it.  She's also hoarding trash on the side of the house under a broken lawn mower that I don't know how to get rid of. 

That, in itself, is gross. But what's worse is that I tend to throw any food items in with Hubbins bowel program stuff because I figured it wouldn't tempt them. 

Yes... she ate from a bag that had feces and a urine bag in it. 

She. ate. from. it.

That's why I'm in time out.  Because I am about to lose it. 

They get breakfast in the morning.  They get lunch and they have a snack. Dinner... I NEED to take a picture of what they are eating. We had salad, spaghetti and french bread for dinner last night.  The meatballs are huge! Hubbins made it and I told him each meatball was like eating a full hamburger patty and he replied "actually, it's more like two hamburger patties."

This has to be a control issue and not a food issue. 

Right now, at this very moment...I just can't deal. 

That other thing that happened Tuesday night

In the previous post I briefly mentioned being able to take two children to catechism.



The boy ended up at the library but CDQ stayed for her class. They hadn't been to class in a few weeks due to behavior so I was talking to the teacher to see if there was anything we needed to do to catch her up.



But while the teacher was talking, I heard one girl ask CDQ who she was voting for. (And BTW, my kids have had arguments at the dinner table who they are going to vote for and why. It's amazing what they retain but I'm not entirely convinced they actually understand what they are saying.lol) CDQ said Obama and the girl's voice went down in disgust.



"You're going to vote for Obama? Do you know he's for abortion."
She hissed the last part at CDQ.

I wish I was exaggerating.



By this point I wasn't even listening to the instructor, but was watching what was taking place. CDQ looked taken aback by this girl who had such a look of disgust and had literally shrunk back away from her in her chair.



People may disagree with me, and I do understand that this is someone else's child but my child was involved too.



From across the room I said "Uh, uh. You are not going to do that to her. She does not need you saying those things to her just because she doesn't believe the same things you do. Just like you have a choice so does she."



The instructor who was still talking to me asked what was going on. I told her that my daughter didn't need to be brainwashed to believe the same things. She told me she had just been asking the kids who they were voting for in the election when we came in. I also told her we don't align ourselves with everything the church says.



I don't. To me, God and religion are two very different things. To me there is God. Then there is religion which is man made and prone to error. I will not blame God for the things that people do.



I was livid that this was happening. This is America: Freedom, choice, etc... and this is Catechism: no judgement, no hate, etc...



I continued to speak to the teacher and when I was done I went up to CDQ and I told her that I wanted her to understand that Obama is not for abortion. He's for a woman's right to choose because in the end it's a woman's choice and no one elses.



I don't want her growing up and believing that it is someone else's fault women have abortions. Because whether people like or not, whether it is legal or not, there will be abortions. If she ends up having an abortion in life, she has no one else to blame but herself. ( of course there are exceptions: rape, health, etc.) I want her to grow up knowing that should she put herself in a situation where she has been irresponsible, she can find herself at this predicament that only she can decide. She has to know that she has to be responsible for whatever outcome of her actions and how it's not to be taken lightly. She has to know where she stands before she ever comes to that crossroad, if ever. She has to know these things so she can prevent it. THAT is the best way I feel I can teach my kids about abortion. It is a slippery slope and it is not black and white.



When I went to pick CDQ up she was telling the other kids how she was told she should vote for McCain because she is white and that all the white people should vote for McCain. Apparently, they also told a black child that she should vote for Obama because she is black. This caused the girl to cry. They were about to break into groups where there would be a McCain table and only "McCain Lovers" could sit there and an Obama table where only "Obama Lovers" could sit.



If you are saying WTF? So was I. I asked her what the teacher did and she told me that the teacher told the kids they were going too far. If you ask me, the teacher let this go too far and the fact that she's the one who started it quite frankly pisses me off.

Losing My Religion

I'm part of the Roman Catholic Homeschoolers in my area. I joined because I had no idea how to get started in homeschooling. When I signed up, it looked like it was going to be fun. Playdates with the kids, Mom's night out, field trips.

I didn't get to do any of those yet because I'm still "training" my kids amongst other things.

But lately the tone on the forum had changed. It was sinister, hateful and full of lies.

Some examples:

The left-wing knew about a PBS poll in advance (THEY CHEATED!) and we need to go vote for Palin--JESUS help US!

Obama wants to change the national anthem to "I want to teach the world to sing"-- FORGIVE US WE KNOW NOT WHAT WE DO!

Obama is Muslim-- GOD HAVE MERCY!

If you vote for someone who is pro-abortion you will be *gasp* EX-COMMUNICATED! and by your ownself to boot!

Worse yet, if you recieve communion having voted for a pro-abortionist (yep- pro-abortion- like it's something people cheer for! ABORTION! ABORTION! You know you want one! You know you need one! RAh Rah rah!, sheesh) "you yourself risk placing your soul going in hell"!!!!!!

Seriously... they've been posting this shit. I had enough. I'll bet you I get censored. But I had to say something. It's immature, it's hateful, it's lies. Is this the new Catholicism? Christianity in general?

For as long as I can remember abortion is something I have personally been against but would never tell someone else they could not do.

Even when I found out my mother had an abortion and that I could have had a full blooded sibling--one other person in this world, a real family, maybe someone like me-- I still could not be against it.

When Bela was murdered my feelings became even stronger. I don't doubt that abortion is painful. But I think that abortion of a fetus,baby, what have you is possibly less painful for the baby than to look in to your mother's eyes as she beats you or know that your Daddy who is supposed to love you so much has hurt you so bad you are dying.

I've held drug addicted babies as they've screeched from the pain of the light being to bright or the withdrawals being too much. Have you seen a newborn twitch in pain?

I've seen those babies growing up being destroyed, molested, abused, used.

I think it's worse when a 14 year old decides the pain of her life, the lack of love, caring and family hurts so much she would rather be dead and kill herself.

It's not to say that I don't care or love the kids I am talking about, but can't you just love a person so much you would rather they be in Heaven rather than living here in Hell?

I've seen what a lot of people can't fathom. They can't figure out why an abortion could be a better alternative. I've often wished that life circumstances could have been different and that I was the child who was aborted. No more pain. Just sweet Heaven.

Abortion will never be an answer for me and I can't put myself in another woman's shoes and know why she does it, but I don't need to know. It's something that she will live with for the rest of her life and only a decision she can make for herself.