Partying Like She's 9 years old!

Today my baby girl turned 9 years old (yes, that is a dog cake) . We have been through thick and thin. Good and Bad. She's always been there to lick away my tears and try to purr me back to happiness.

People will say she's just a cat. But as you can see, she's not just any cat (She's getting ready to blow out the candle on her cake for crying out loud, how ordinary is that?). She's very special and I tell her all the time that she HAS to outlive me.
It still amazes me that I've had this little life that I am responsible for. Yeah, I know I have 5 kids now...but hello, my cat who depends on me completely made it to 9 years old. I've kept her alive and healthy for 9 years. That's a miracle! I remember her from day 1, she was a little itty bitty newborn, her mother had just given birth to her in a box in our garage. She was and still is so beautiful!

She's sitting here, curled up next to me, too pooped to keep her eyes open. (She partied hard, but those pictures are top secret, she doesn't want the scandal).

Even though she's not happy with her new pest of a brother, Mook, she still allowed him to have a piece of cake. Too bad she didn't extend the invite to her sisters. lol

Happy Birthday Scrawnie-brat!

Nine is Fine

SS wanted cupcakes for her birthday celebration at home and these are enormous ones from Costco. They were like individual mini cakes. I heart Costco soooo much!

Being 9 is so exciting. Can't you see the excitement on her face? Presents! Presents! Presents!

And presents there were. You might remember that post about the Dora Vanity? Well, I didn't want it to go to waste so I decided to give it to this child. I see I did something right. lol
Can you see the sheer joy of receiving a Strawberry Shortcake styling head (or some such thing)? And we can't forget the beautiful Tutu that she received from TKW over at The Decorated Duckling can we? She felt like such a princess. (Those beautiful Tutus will be a separate post, because CDQ got one too and they are so beautiful!)
I am so amazed by this kid, I was so afraid that we might have lost her when she was first placed here. She never showed emotion, she hardly spoke. We had no idea who she was and if she was even really still there. She seemed like such a shell of a child. She had been through and seen so much.

I remember meeting her when she was about 2 years old. She would run into my room while I worked on the computer and she would stand there with her hand upturned and say "why?" when I would respond "why what?" she would ask a question and I would answer her and she would say "why?" again. It seemed like she wasn't even interested in the answer. She just wanted to say "why?". lol

Her progress over the last three months has been amazing. She's a sassy and silly girl with a big heart. Her smile lights up her face and shows her true beauty inside and out. She is such a hard worker and she cares so deeply about so many things.

Her naivety cracks us all up on a daily basis. I worry about it but I figure as long as she feels comfortable in front of us to make her mistakes maybe we can work on bringing her up to speed.

Happy Ninth Birthday!

LEAP!

Friday was CDQ's 8th Birthday. I have two 8 year olds until Wednesday!


CDQ is the child that I worry about the most. They just started her on meds two weeks ago but I'm almost positive we will be getting a bipolar diagnosis on her. My little sister is bipolar and what she was describing to me is CDQ exactly.


For her birthday, I tried to get her something that would be useful that she couldn't break. Originally, I bought her this Dora vanity but she is not mature enough for it despite what the age says on it, she will destroy it.

Oh and remember how I said to stay tuned for the third installment of She Can See Clearly Now? Well...she could see clearly for about 8 hours.

I've since had them fixed but will her destructive side ever end? At any rate, I came up with getting her a library card for her birthday. At our library kid's are allowed to have their own card at the age of 8. She's an advanced reader and she can never get enough books. This would be the gift that would keep on giving for years to come. So off we went...

At first, she was confused. But when we told her what she was getting she went crazy. I have to admit, I was relieved, I really didn't know how it was going to go over. I allowed her to check out three books, chapter books, she read them all overnight.

We had to keep her from school for the morning because the library would be closed by the time school was out. But in her mind that was even better. Why? I had baked her 4 dozen lemon cupcakes with sprinkles to take to school and all eyes were going to be on her when she came through the door.

She loved every minute of it. Because she is ALLLLL about attention. When she got home, she had to boast that EVERYONE loved the cupcakes and was asking where she got them from and she relished telling them they couldn't get them because I had made them for her.


For dinner, we had pizza and then we were off to Build-a-Bear where she built herself the cutest Koala. (more on that later)

Then we stopped at the Disney Store where I bought all the kid's (except for the oldest) their adoption outfits. (Hoping to post pics later).


She wanted a strawberry cake and she got it.


This post is very disjointed and much different from her older sister's birthday post.

It's not a case of favoritism, I can't stand love them all very much. It is a very hard one to write. Every time I look at this child, I see her mother's issues. It's so unfair that this innocent child carries such burdens. I begin to feel sorry for her but then those issues manifest and I see her manipulations, lies and coldness.

She has pushed us away and I have given her the space that she seemed to need. Slowly she is coming around and we are starting to learn about who she truly is under all the armor.

I'm very proud of her and I know that she tries. But when I see her like she is pictured below. It breaks my heart to see her sadness, her depression, her brokenness and not be able to take it all away for her.

I wonder what it is she wishes for?

Happy Birthday CDQ!

Twelve

Twelve years ago today I quietly stood in the corner of a hospital delivery room and watched you come into the world. I was angry when the nurse walked towards me during your delivery to ask me how I was doing. I was fine, they had more important "stuff" to attend to.



3 months before that I had outed your mother to the world. She was 15 and she was pregnant and why wasn't anyone acknowledging it. I bought the pregnancy test that showed positive. I took your mother to her appointments. I bought you clothes and your very first car seat. I made sure you were ready to come home.

I tried to make sure you were well taken care of but I had 4 other kids I was caring for who seemed to need me more.

When I first realized that things weren't right, I called CPS to try and get you help. They did nothing. After many years and more babies, I stopped because no one would help.

If I had known how bad it really was for you, I would have never stopped and I wouldn't have ever let you go back. I didn't know that such heartless and cruel people existed. My world was still tinted pink with naivety.

This is your second birthday that we celebrate since your placement with me. You've grown into such a intelligent young lady, albeit a little rough around the edges but it's my job to teach you and polish you to help you shine.

I kept telling you to hold on to 11 and now I am going to keep nagging you to hold on to 12. They only come once and they go by so fast. When childhood passes, it's gone and as you know the world can be so very cruel. I only want happiness and the best for you. I know right now you can't understand that.

But hopefully, some day you will. I worry about you and the secrets that you keep. I hope you will grow to trust me and to understand I am only doing right by you. I hope you don't shut me out like your mother did and find yourself lost in a downward spiral. I keep telling you that you aren't her but I see you making so many of the same mistakes she did and it scares me.

You are so much smarter and better. I wish you knew that.



Happy Twelfth Birthday DROOLER*!

Love you.

*I used to call her Drooler when she was a baby because she was always drooling.