It's a Go!

Everything checked out with the van/shuttle. There were a few minor things but they will all be resolved by the company before I pick it up.

I will be flying in and driving it back home. For now let's just say I will be driving across many states. I am nervous because I've never been away from Hubbins in all the time we have been together and I've never left him in anybody else's care. I've also never been really far away from the kids either.

My kids are freaking out a little (well, maybe a lot). The boy surprised me. Well, the oldest surprised me with the news that the boy has been daydreaming about disasters that may occur and my early demise. Not in a bad way as in, he wants it to happen but more that he's afraid it will happen. He even cried. This is the child I worry about now. Sometimes I feel like he's formed no attachments with anyone. I don't know if it's a guy thing but he's been pretty good at hiding that sort of emotion. Even though every other emotion is worn plainly on his sleeve.

All I know is that when the time comes for me to go, I just want to get back as quickly as possible. This is my own emotion that shocks me since *I've* been daydreaming about a break- a vacation.

Now all I can think about is getting back.

I have to admit, I'm a little thrilled to see my kids worrying and caring about me. Seems a little twisted but after all this time, it's a nice change.