**Language Warning**
So, this morning I woke up to a bank account that I just don't understand. $200 in fees that I don't understand.
Before I appear like a complete moron, my first job when I was 16 was in data processing at the local bank. My last job before my current job was in Information Technology. I know they are using their databases to screw people.
Sure, I should keep a register and sure, I should know my balances...if I had legitimately been charged for my mistakes, I would suck it up and move on, plus I would still have $170 in my pocket. But I feel the practice of backing out all my transactions from the LAST THREE WEEKS and reordering them so that the smaller amounts (i.e. $1.07. $3.98, etc...) are the most current and the larger amounts are the oldest so that they can charge me $30 multiple times is worthy of an asskicking. There's not mine. Especially when the bitch CSR on the other end of the line is lying.
Do I think shooting up a building is justified? no. But I think I can see how someone would lose it. But I digress.
So, I went searching for a new bank...I thought I had scoured all the information at this particular bank and it looked good. So I applied. Then I logged in for online banking where I was offered the opportunity to earn $100 for opening a new account. Ahem.
If you said "Cool Sasha, you just opened an account and earned $100. Go girl!" then you are sadly mistaken.
I launched the chat window to see if I qualified for this offer. The CSR successfully found me the very URL I was staring at with the offer on it. At this point I am thinking Oh Shit I probably typed it weird and he misunderstood me. I explain again that I just opened an account 20 minutes ago and when I launched my online banking there was an offer to earn $100 if I opened an account. He directs me to the right phone number I need to call.
So I call the number. I'm speaking to the CSR there, telling the story again for the third time.
She tells me there isn't an offer like that unless you go the home page then there is this "thing called a banner that changes." That's where the offer is. I explain to her that actually the offer is sitting on my online banking page under new accounts and special offers.
She tells me if I type in the url I *might* see the offer at the top of the page. "Like right now, I'm at the website and the banner says we now print copies of checks on receipts when you pay with a check."
Me: "Oh, I see, I didn't see that because I did a search for bank name checking and it took me straight to your checking page."
Her: "Oh, well you have to go to bank name .com. You can't go through another websites page. "
Me: "But it's not another websites page, it's still part of bank name. "
Her: "You have to go to bank name .com, that's the only way to see the banner."
Me: "Really, that check receipt thing seems like a great feature...so do I have to go to the homepage every day and refresh it every time to find out what your bank offers me as a customer or is there a page I can go to where all the new offers are at?"
Her: *silence* then "You have to go to the website bank name.com"
Me: *thud, thud, thud* the sound of bashing my head against the desk.
Her: "I can check and see if your application has been processed and if it hasn't I can cancel it and you can start again and use the code for that offer?"
Me: "ok"
Her: "It looks like it's not here yet. You can keep calling us within the next three hours so we can cancel it, but if we process it before or in between your calls we can't cancel it. Sorry."
Me:"Ok, bye."
About 15 minutes later, I get an e-mail that my application has been processed. fuckers
P.S. Did I mention they held my direct deposit paycheck so they could overdraft me and then deposited it so they could collect their fees?
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